Friends

Blog 1308

Friends

John 15:15

This writer has always been a loner. Never many close friends. Mark Twain said that in order for a person to have friends, he must be friendly. I believe I was friendly, a very good salesman (worked my way through eight years of professional schooling, always as top salesman selling bibles, shoe store, cemetery lots), outstanding private practice (editor of a professional journal for eight years, professional honors, NC young man of the year), military promotions (field grade commander, chief of clinics), demand as a speaker-writer, but, these are all professional qualities. The nature of friendship is different, there must be a sharing, an interconnection, closely resembling the human nature relationship with divine nature. In “mamby-pamby” Christianity, we think that God is just messing around with us, that we can bargain with God. That he needs us instead of our needing him. We actually believe that God needs us. God does exactly what he pleases, He is in charge, He is boss. If he wanted the city of Chicago saved, he would do it. The nature of God could have been given to rocks or monkeys. The one who measures the Himalayas with His fingers, his toes in the Marianas Trench of the Pacific, who named the stars and knows the very hairs on your head chooses to love me. A mystery I will never understand. The challenge, he chose those whom he wanted as His family before the foundation of the world. The elect, chosen, predestined, cannot comprehend their good fortune, their gift. Those he did not choose, those who do not want him or anyone who does serve him, have no comprehension of what they are missing, now and for eternity.

If you are saved, under Christ's blood, new creation of God, you better be different from those of the world. He told us that the world would not know us because it did not know him.. 1 Peter 4:12-19.

I always knew I was different, I'm still different...many might say I'm a crumudgeonly heretic, nutty, religious fanatic. In a world of political correctness, popularity ,(Winning Friends and Influencing People), the war-worn Christian, wearing the whole armor of God, digging in, standing fast, has learned not to turn his back. None of the armor of God protects your back, not one inch, and, it is rare to find another human being in this world who is not a back stabber. We want a checklist Christianity- patriotism. ”You do do this and you don't do that”.

The greatest military force in the world is one called “esprit de corps”. A tightness-friendship between warriors. The difference on a sports team is a closeness called friendship- team spirit. One mother heard her child praying, “God, make my mother as nice at home as she is at church.” I never felt that my family were my friends...expecting-rejecting. Your family should stick with you regardless.

Most neighbors do not know one another. Most families do not know one another. They have much more knowledge of personalities on the television set, have a closeness with their favorite talk show host. Every town, small or large, helicopters flying over, police cars with windows up because of air conditioning...so afraid they might come in contact with a citizen. Much like the Christian, on the battlefront for the Lord, fighting from an air conditioned fox hole. I heard Dr. James Dobson say on the radio that 87% of all people in nursing homes never have a visitor. I have written many articles concerning the callousness shown old people by families. People who had worked and sacrificed, their families just waiting for their deaths...a love for “free money” if any is left.

Hard to say, but so true. You discover the depth of friendship at the end of life. I believe that in my lifetime, we have seen one half of all burials in cremation. There was a time that families wanted a final tribute to a loved friend. Caskets are now made of seaweed and recycled newspapers. One of my friends working at a prestigious funeral home in my city said, “the best known families in town, those who can afford to spend, don't ask for the cheapest but next to the cheapest. They just want to get it over.” If not a veteran with a flag, the family asks that the casket be covered by the church pall or Christian flag.

There is a general cheapening of life. Intentions cannot be substituted by performance. We may not intend to abort three thousand babies each day, but it is done...three thousand precious young lives (1500 black babies when the population of blacks is only 13%. 52% of all black babies are aborted). Think of these millions of friends (known only to God). On the same block as my downtown house, a children's museum.. This writer has heard sounds around the earth...wildlife in Africa, birds in the Seychelles, but the most beautiful sound these ears have ever heard: The children playing, laughing and talking at this museum with their friends.

Only when you can no longer put your feet under your mother's eating table will you realize that the best friend you will ever possess was your mother. I have said to so many young people, “be kind to your mother, she is the best friend you will ever have”.

I t was at the cross at which our blessed Lord was crucified, that we see true friendship. His mother was there and Mary's friends were with her. The youngest disciple, John was there. (John, brother of James, sons of Zebedee, John only seventeen years of age when he became an disciple. Writer of the gospels his three epistles and the Revelation.) (The one who Jesus so loved.) The others had fled, and, it was Joseph of Aramathea, a true friend, who took the responsibility of burying our blessed Lord.

We wonder why so many warriors, veterans of war, young lives have so much trouble adjusting on their return from the battle front. We wonder why so many young people, raised in the church, have trouble adjusting to the world after college. The warriors have seen their friends spattered on the battlefield and just how little anyone cares. Students, even students from “supposed” Christian homes have learned the hypocrisy of religiosity, how little church people care that six hundred million tax dollars given to planned parenthood for abortions and birth control. Those who are “supposed” to care about life...God's greatest creation.

Kindness costs so little. We live in a very unkind world. Friendships are so valuable. There are things in the scientific world which have kept me hanging on my faith, the clotting of blood which only God could have designed, photosynthesis of plants. Bilaterally symmetrical animals which only God could have designed.)Put a mirror down the mid section of any animal, either side is an exact replica of the other...two lungs, two kidneys, reproductive organs, eyes, ears, etc., etc.). Far beyond science, technology, psychology, sociology. That mystical union between two distinct objects such as a relationship between two people, that divine relationship between man and his Creator.

It is folly to attempt description of friendship. Like so many things, you know it when you see it or feel it. As a child, I could sense the friendship between old ladies quilting. I could sense the friendship of a professor when he knew I understood. Over and over, I have said to young people, “Keep your friendships in repair.” This writer met two elderly sisters at the famous Peninsula Hotel in Hong Kong. I became the son to whom they had never given birth...often visited them in Manhattan. They enjoyed the conversations and company of a man, even at their age. I was their friend until their death. Pity the person who has never given the most valuable thing you possess, yourself, to someone else in friendship...expecting nothing in return except the same. But, there are those who have rejected the greatest friend imaginable. One who can, in return, give all the blessings of living and dying.