#11
1.AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.
2.Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, 'Please come out and give yourself up.'
2. An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
3.A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
4.Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: 'Give me all your money or I 'll shoot', the man shouted, 'that's not what I said!'
6. A man spoke frantically into the phone: 'My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart'. 'Is this her first child?' the doctor asked. 'No!' the man shouted, 'This is her husband!'
7. In Modesto, CA , Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
8. Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat, going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE.
Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!
Addition by Dr. Morris: I have 3 more to add to this list.
9.For over 100 years, the people of North Carolina have been ruled by Democrats. Twice in this time, by a slim margin, a Republican governor was elected. A few times, by a slim margin, republican US senators were elected (Helms, East, Dole, Burr, etc.). Legislature always Democrats, all bureaucrats Democrat, all boards, council of state, democrat. On a national scale Highway 95 east to the ocean, if it were a state, would be the poorest state in the country. More homes without inside plumbing than any other state in the country. Fewest paved roads, poorest schools, yet, these people almost in lockstep, race to the polls to vote for Democrats. The Piedmont and western part of the state are not quite as extreme, but would you not think that people of nominal intelligence would want a change?
10. Americans love war, we have been involved in so many. If not a war with planes leaving carriers, jets dropping bombs, a war on poverty, drugs, illiteracy, now terror. In spite of being taxed to the hilt, supposedly having the most intelligent people on earth running everything, we manage to lose all these wars.
11. I live in a county in which I am afraid to walk down the street, it is not the crime, even though there is much of it, it is not the weather, although there is much of it. I live in a county where the people actually went to the polls and voted for an increase in their taxation. We have never know taxes to be reduced, always increased. We have not known a time of prosperity, always recession. The politicians in this county instructed the bureaucrats of this county to totally infiltrate this county and tell them that if they want their real estate taxes reduced they must vote for an increase in sales tax. The people in the county were actually dumb enough to believe, that very week the real estate taxes were raised.
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