Bitter or Better

One of the finest men I ever knew, already age 82 when I first met him, was Mr. A.M. Dickinson. Right on to that advanced age he was still working. He had always worked as a cotton buyer, one who could determine the quality of cotton from a bale, so the producer could get a fair price.

I met him because he had come to me as a patient, losing his eyesight because of glaucoma, was almost blind at the time. He said, “since my wife died I want to continue working because it makes me feel wanted and productive.” His daughter would go by his house each morning and drive him to work. Mr. Dickinson's problem, he enjoyed walking and exercise. For those of us blind or partially sighted, there is nothing more scary than facing the unknown...fire in the house, a hole in the sidewalk, a growling dog. He walking down the street when he was attacked by two pitbulls who knocked him down and killed him.

I made it a practice long ago not to look at the deceased, I certainly do not want anyone staring at me. But, because of my relationship with the family, I went to the visitation and the daughter talked with me about his wounds. The mortician had done his best to make him presentable, but I can only imagine the terror and pain he went through because of mutilation by pitbulls.

This week in Pender County, a 4 year-old girl was mutilated by a pitbull. Do you think a child will ever recover from such terror? The last time I made a house call, as a doctor, a son had come by my office and asked me to come by and check on his infirmed mother. These black people lived on the edge of town, the hospital had more or less told them there was nothing else to be done. The family just felt that because of her confidence in me, it would make her last days more bearable if I went by to see her. I remember driving up to the front of the house, a very dilapidated structure, I tooted the horn so they would know someone was there. I got out of the car with my bag and started up the yard. A pack of bulldogs came out from under the house and it was one of the most frightful experiences I have ever encountered. I beat them off with the bag until I could get back in the car. If I had been knocked down, there is no doubt in my mind that they would have killed me.

Every day, 1000 Americans go to the hospital because of dog bites. In 2010, 34 human beings were killed because of dog attack, 4.7 million victims annually, mostly children. $1 billion in financial losses each, paid by insurance companies and individuals.

The question is, and I realize that there are people who love their pets more than they love their fellow man, (In fact, I have had people tell me so), when will human beings learn to not keep ferocious, unrestrained, terrorizing animals in places that they can attack other human beings? I understand that illegal drug dealers, illegal counterfeit operators, illegal evildoers of every type keep their ferocious animals around, not only for their own protection but to scare off anyone, including law officers.

Evil has been glamorized all around us, people of questionable mentality, even glamorized ferocious animal life. In Africa, and I don't remember the country, I visited a large snake farm, where ferocious snakes were housed. Cages with panthers, Presa Canario dogs, the most dangerous dogs known to man. I was told that these animals were purchased by African rulers and dictators to keep their subjects, and particularly their prisoners, under control. I know that in the Seychelles Islands, a police state, the despot would threaten prisoners with such. Can one even imagine man's inhumanity to man, the evil mind that would have such around, a group of people at the United Nations in New York, who turn a blind eye to such activity going on in many countries?

We know the lie of babies thrown from incubators in Kuwait during the activities of the first Gulf War. No one has questioned the truthfulness of Saddam Hussein using violent animals against his enemies. The question remains, why does a civilized world continue to permit such uncivilized actions?

Dogfighting is a multi-million dollar criminal activity in America. Mr. Vick, the black football player, made the news by being involved. Can one even imagine what mentality, how some brain must be wired to get enjoyment from such horrendous activity among men or animals? One thing I was told at the violent animal farm in Africa, “we play loud music (noise such as we hear from cars at traffic lights), we bang on their cages, we antagonize the animals in every way to make them just as vicious as possible.” It is not often that serpents will attack one another, but the serpents at this place were so ferocious that they were balled up in their attacks. Ever since my experience there, and God knows I never should have experienced such, I have considered what the guide told me, that if a tyrant could not get just the results he wanted from parents, such a snake was thrown in the bed of their children.

In facing life, we get bitter or better, when I lost my eyesight, it would have been so easy to get bitter, and I went through that for a while. Oh God, why me?! What did I do to deserve this? It is only when you have been washed clean by the precious blood of Jesus Christ that you can get over your bitterness toward everything and become a better, cleaner vessel. A fat man does not want to be fat, but you cannot keep eating and expect to get thin. You do not accomplish anything, good grades without going to class, a good job by not working, become a good father by accident.

I was a Christian when young, but I wish I had been a better Christian in my youth when I had the energy, and a sharper mind for service. I am sorry I spent so much time with people, relatives, who did not deserve my time, who did not care about anything but themselves. But, you cannot be bitter about evil and unconcern in the world, you only strive to be better yourself.